I Never Promised You a Rose Garden

I never promised you a rose garden.

But I did promise you a sign tutorial.  Did you think I forgot?

Never.

And I was going to write one….but why?

Why would I even attempt to show my definitely amateur sign-making tutorial when Kristen from The Simple Things has written a truly professional step-by-step tutorial on how to make a sign. 

And she shows you how to white wash.

And she uses fence posts for the sign……how brilliant is that?

And she sent it to me…..to show all of you.

You’d think it was my birthday week or something

Take it away Kristen.

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Hello!  My name is Kristin and I am guest posting from The Simple Things .  I have a huge love for home decorating and especially DIY projects!  On my blog, you will find an array of DIY projects, recipes and a little bit of my personal life tossed in every now and again.  My husband and I own a relatively small condo, but just because it’s small doesn’t mean it can’t be beautiful!  We are constantly thinking of ways to make it more livable, organized and just plain gorgeous. 

I’m sharing with you today, a super easy DIY art project.  It cost us less than $11 and is probably my favorite piece in our entire house!

 

Over the past month, my husband and I decided to redecorate our entire downstairs(living room and dining room).  You can find the before and after pictures here.  The project wasn’t totally complete and our living room was lacking a piece of art to go over our couch:

 

See?

We didn’t like anything we found at the various home decor stores we went to, so we decided to take matters into our own hands!

 

Here is what we came up with:

 

Here’s how to make it:

 

5 fence pieces 3.5″ x 4′

Cut off the ends of the fence with a jig saw to create a jagged edge.

Distress to your hearts content!  Seriously, hammers, nails, screws…anything you can get your hands on!  Go at it!

We “white washed” the boards, I just took flat latex paint and watered it down.  We used paper towels to wipe off the excess.

Once the boards are dry, align them how you want them to look on the wall.

 Take 3/4″ x 1 1/2″ wood.  Take 1 1/4″ screws and screw into each plank.

The boards are now screwed together and we are almost ready to paint!

 

We bought a frame hanging kit and installed it using the directions on the package.

Ready to paint!

We used our handy-dandy projector for this next part.  Scott hand drew the word “love” because we couldn’t find any fonts that we liked(yes, he is awesome).  Align the projector where you want the word and get to work!

 

Just simply trace the words onto the wood with whatever color paint you would like!

 

During this part, we realized we liked the “shabby” look of the letters not being totally colored in.

Letters colored in completely.

We really wanted the shabby look so we took sandpaper to the letters to “distress” them.

And Voila!

A perfectly shabby chic piece of art work for less than $11! 

 

 

We LOVE how it turned out  And I hope you do too!  

 

If you have any questions about it, please feel free to hop on over to my blog and leave a comment!  I’d be happy to help!

 

Kristin

The Simple Things

 

Thanks Kristen. 

 

I am glad there are sign makers like you in blog land.

 

Please be sure and stop by Kristen’s blog for even more incredible projects, like this jute wrapped monogram.

 

PS  Have an awesome weekend.

Dear Book Club

Dear Book Club,

I’m sorry I was late.

I know you weren’t surprised.

I was going to be there.  Really. 

I had my schedule cleared.  I had finished the book.  I had my cute book club outfit on.  I was even leaving my house early.  Truly, I had my keys and I was walking out the door…. 

 

….and I on my way, I passed by the dining room and noticed that the hutch was….well….how can I put this….

                                …..grey.

Yep.

Grey.

Way too grey for me.

And….I did have a few extra minutes.

So I got out the power sander and plugged it in and started to distress a little of that grey.  Right then and there.  In my dining room….on a step stool….with my cute book club outfit on.

I did get a little carried away. 

I did spend longer distressing away the grey than I anticipated.

But you understand.

I just couldn’t go to Book Club and have a meaningful discussion on “Mara:  Daughter of the Nile” when that hutch was sitting in my dining room all big and grey and everything.

And I knew that you would want my full attention.  After all, I really liked the part about how Mara ended up being a double-agent for the Egyptian government and I also knew we would all want to discuss how she managed to get out of the walled city.

But I also knew I would not be able to concentrate….thinking about my overabundance of painted grey wood.

I know you are all relieved, knowing that the hutch situation has been taken care of.

I’m sure next month will be better.

You see, I don’t really have any other un-distressed large grey pieces of furniture, so I feel confident in telling you….I promise I will be there when the doors open.

Thanks for being so understanding about all this.

PS  Maybe I should have it at my house next month, just in case. 

PSS  All photographs of my distressed hutch were taken by RTM Connect.

Exclamation Points R Us

What do you think of the exclamation point?

Can we all agree there are a lot of “!!!!” in blogland?

Do you think it’s trite?

Overused?

A worn out and tired piece of punctuation?

I must speak up here in defense of the lowly exclamation point.

For in my humble opinion, there is nothing that says it better than a little  “!”  So much so, that I think I am forming a support group called “Exclamation Points R Us.”  (catchy title, huh)

A group where punctuation is celebrated and where exclamation points can run rampant and wild and free.

Seriously.

Can you imagine the world without any excitable punctuation.  What would you do if you wanted to show off your new burlap curtains….

….and you were excited.  Really excited.  Almost like when you gave birth or got married or got straight ‘A’s” or painted the world’s most comment-worthy dresser or finally took all your Christmas decorations down. 

Almost as excited as that….but not quite.

Still, even a little excitement needs an exclamation point.

“I have new burlap curtains.”

Lame.

A simple statement.  Lukewarm at best.  From someone who has ordinary, run-of-the-mill curtains.

But what if the curtains used to be dropcloths?

What if they were smocked?

What if they were long and beautiful and the perfect shade of burlapness and you had a secret crush on them?

Don’t you think that long, beautiful, smocked, used to-be-dropcloth curtains deserve an exclamation point?

Or two!!

Two may be too many, though.  I’m not sure that’s approved.

I have to run it by the board of “Exclamation Points R Us.”

PS  If you would like to follow along as we discuss dustbunnies or stinky socks or Christina Aguilara, please feel free to add your e-mail to the box on my sidebar.

PSS  All photographs in this post were taken by RTM Connect.

PSSS  I’m showing off my new burlap curtains, exclamation points and all over at Kim’s and over here and here.

Imperfect Perfection

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imperfect perfection

I think perfection can be overwhelming.

At least for me it is.  Am I the only one?

Perfection in blogland is everywhere.

Sometimes when I see rooms like this or this or this done with such effortless perfection, it can be overwhelming. 

And sitting in my kitchen with a sink full of dishes and dust bunnies on the floor and stacks of laundry on the couch, it is easy for self-doubt to creep in.  Blog after blog after blog featuring incredible creativity and marble countertops and perfectly distressed cabinets and magazine feature-worthy photographs.

It makes you feel like you’re back in high school when everyone had perfectly styled wings in their hair….held in place with Aqua Net Hairspray and they looked like Christy Brinkley and your hair was curly and you looked like Nellie Olsen from Little House On the Prairie.

Imperfect. 

And you look at all your imperfections and *sigh*.

And wonder why did you forget to put a tree skirt under your tree at Christmas?

And wonder why were there pumpkins in your nativity scene?

And wonder why were your Christmas decorations still up when February rolled around?

Why?

Straight up.  There is a definite dearth of perfection around here.

But is perfection all it’s cracked up to be?  Is it really what we should all aspire to?  Should perfection really be our ideal?

Perfection seems to me like those beautiful new bedroom sets they advertise at the Columbus Day Sale where five pieces come perfectly coordinated.  A room in a box for one low, low price. 

Perfect.

And matching.

And a little boring.

Imperfection is a lot like this iron piece.  My brother created it from scrap wood and rusty iron he found at a yard sale.  He created something wonderful by emphasizing its imperfections.  It’s worn and old and scraped and distressed by life.

And this worn, rusted, piece of iron and wood tells a story.  And it’s story is beautiful.

Imperfect perfection.

I want imperfect perfection to be my story. 

I want it to be my voice.

So today, I want to celebrate my imperfections.  I want to celebrate who I am.  And be happy in my heart with my imperfect self….

                                    ….and then figure out a way to incorporate those Christmas decorations into my Fourth of July celebration

Do you have any imperfections you want to celebrate?

Please join me and 100,000 imperfect people over at the Nester’s party:

PS  If you want to see absolute perfection….please stop by june and bear to see an interview with the twins.

You Have it By a Yard

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yarstick

Remember in grade school when they tried to teach the metric system?

Centimeters.

Millimeters.

Decimeters.

I don’t think it really took off.

And I, for one, am glad.

I kinda like inches and feet and yards.

In the ongoing battle between standard measurement and the metric system…..

image found here

….I’ll take the yardstick’s side every time.

Really.

I mean…..who can even look at a decimeter…..

image found here

…..when the yardstick is capable of this.

image found here

Who even remembers a 1000 millimeters equal one meter….

image found here

…..when you are wearing this?

image found here

….or this.

In the face of such overwhelming versatility and creativity, I think the creators of the metric system are re-thinking the whole thing.

You see, while the meter has it’s advantages….I mean, it is european and used world-wide and linear in its thinking and everything.

But in this contest…..there simply is no debate….

….the humble yardstick is a clear winner.

Case in point…..when you google yardstick table….

image found here

…..you find this.

*sigh*  Be still my beating heart.

On the other hand, when you google centimeter table….

image found here

…….you get a little something that looks like this.

I rest my case. 

PS  If you this was not enough yardstick inspiration and you want a little more….click here.

PSS  If you are tired of amateur hour with the pinterest and you want to see an expert in the field….please check out Sherry of Pondered, Primed, Perfected’s pinterest boards.  She is the true rock star.

Not Wordless Wednesday

Who doesn’t love a good “Wordless Wednesday” post?

Well, this isn’t one.

Because it’s Thursday.

And I am not, nor ever have been, wordless.

But I had to share a picture that is worth at least 10,000 words.

source

Please tell me you have seen this.

Please tell me that you laughed out loud.

Please tell me I’m not the only one.

Seriously.

I could not let the sun set on Thursday without sharing.

And I know it’s wrong…..

                            …..but it does make me feel so much better about yesterday? 

The Project That Almost Was

I wanted it to work. 

I mean….I’ve seen it done before.

After all….I’ve seen it on pinterest (that alone should have guaranteed success).

And after it worked, I was going to post about it.  And you would leave rave reviews and wonderful comments telling me how you always wanted to make a project just like this.

And then, you would make the project.  And we would become best project friends forever.

 

When I planned this spectacular project, I started by covering all my books with brown craft paper.

Next, I planned to take these labels….

….and trace them onto my newly covered books with this graphite paper.

Sounds easy.

Sounds brilliant.

Actually, it sounded easy and brilliant and classic and rave-review worthy.

But somehow….along the way….my easy, brilliant, classic, rave-review project turned into….

 
….something that I might have done in high school English class in my notebook when we were supposed to be copying down prepositional phrases.

*sigh*

I know. 

Weak. 

My favorite part is where you can see the tracing from the graphite paper.

Classy.

It’s like I was so close…..and yet so far.

So, if at first you don’t succeed, go to Hobby Lobby and purchase some of these.

Tags.  Pre-printed with numbers.

Take your pre-printed Hobby Lobby tags and print the titles of the books on them.

And glue dot them onto the books, so they look like this.

Not like this.

I know it’s not a fancy schmancy graphite project.

I know it’s printed labels on craft paper covered books.

Not exactly ground-breaking. 

Not exactly what I was going for in my efforts to make us project BFF’s.

But it’s legible.

And after the prepositional phrase graphite debacle,

….legible works for me.

You Had Me At Hello

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family, valentine

You had me at hello.

                 …..wonderful valentine of mine.

You didn’t like to talk much.

I talked enough for the both of us (and a few hundred more).

You were from the country.

I was a city girl.

You were overwhelmed.

I was overwhelming.

I think a little piece of me fell in love with you on that long ago night.

Before you became my best friend.

Before you became my one and only.

Before I ever really knew the wonder that is you.

Remember the first apartment with the plastic furniture?

Remember our journey across America in a car without air-conditioning?

Remember fish tacos on the beach at midnight?

Remember how we held hands together when our tiny, premature, 2 lb. twins were born?

Remember the ice storm…

                ….and the flood

                ….and the snow?

Remember every inside joke we ever told?

Remember how we always said it was us against the world?

I do.

And I would do it all over again and again and again.

If I could do it with you. 

And even now….

                        ….after all these years.

You can look at me across the room….with a wink and a smile….

                              ….and my heart beats a little faster.

How did a city girl get to be so blessed?

How did a girl who likes to talk so much learn to revel in the quiet moments?

How could I ever imagine the me that I am…..without you?

Happy Valentine’s Day.

I love you.

And I always will.

Forever and ever.

Amen.

Sign Me Up

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wood signs

I love chippy, distressed, worn and weathered wood signs.

I love creating them.

I love painting them.

I love hanging them.

What do you think that says about me?

Do you think it says I need direction in my life?

Do you think I need to be reminded to go places?

Or do you think that I need advice on proper hygiene?

I think I like signs because they tell people a little about who we are.

Or remind us of where we have been.

Signs can also tell people where we want to go.

 
I am working on a new sign.

It’s going be painted with my mission statement for this year.

“Life is a series of moments called……now.”

This is how I want to live my life in 2012.

Now.

In the moment.

No regrets.

Sometimes we consume ourselves with the destination and forget about the journey.  I want my journey to be purposeful and authentic and I want to experience every step with my arms wide open.  I want to embrace the me that I am at this very second in this very place.

And I’m so glad you are here at this place, at this time, on this journey with me….

                             …..and all my signs

PS  I will be posting a tutorial later this week about how I create these.

PSS  I am linking here and here.

Why Didn’t I Think of That?

I think I am smart.

I think I know a lot about a lot

But apparently not….

                  …..because I didn’t think of…..

…..this. 

Adding labels with decal paper.

I’ve never even heard of decal paper.  But I think it’s my new best friend.

Brilliant.

I never thought of covering my garage door opener with a frame and a hinge.

Why?

But My Uncommon Slice of Suburbia did.

I never thought of removing scratches like this. 

But momoutnumbered did.

I just put my scratchy dishes on display and called it “character.”

Or bought more dishes at yard sales.

I wanted to think up this idea from in my own style.

I mean….I have drawers.  I have books.

I even have drawers with books in them.

Why?

Why didn’t this occur to me?

Trees with hooks.

Simply amazing Decor8blog.

I don’t have trees with hooks at my house.

I don’t have coats hung on hooks on trees.

But I do have coats on the floor.

I think I’m pinning that idea.

Maybe no one else has thought of it

PS  I have pinned all of these images (and a few more things I didn’t think of either) over at my Pintrest board, aptly titled, “Why Didn’t I Think of That?”

PSS  If you have any ideas on your Pintrest boards….please let me know so I can follow along.  I need all the help I can get.